Old Friends — Great Friends

July 25, 2007 at 5:03 am Leave a comment

I spent the other night with 3 of my girlfriends from college. You know, the sorority type. The BIG university type. Well, I was once one of those . . . those rah rah chicks who wore my college or sorority sweatshirt with pride. The kind that never missed a football game and knew the college fight song by my first week at school, and, with pride, sung it at the top of my lungs at football games, surrounded by a whole lot of others doing the same.

I feel really far away from that world most days. I remember it, and I remember it well. Not because I want to relive it, and not because I live in the “glory days” of my college existence.  I seriously lived life with these women. These women that were tossed together by the most bizarre circumstances of college acceptance, dormitory placement, and sorority rush.

With college long over, it’s my sorority sisters and one friend from my freshman year hall in the dormitory, that I remain in close contact with. They are the girlfriends I love the most.  It is these girls with whom I drank too much, lived, shared clothes, shared secret (and silly) handshakes with, and did the date parties and football games with, that I love the most. And I mean really, really, LOVE! They are awesome women!!

My college friends are interesting, beautiful (inside and outside), happy, smart, successful, women. I remember when we started the first round of weddings: we all brought our college boyfriends to the weddings. Then, after a few years, we started showing up single. Then, slowly by surely, we started marrying men that none of us had ever met. We stood up in those ridiculous bridesmaids dresses and gave sincere toasts to the women we adored and the men we barely knew.

The first few years after the “wedding years”, we decided that we needed to see each other more often than at weddings. So, we started annual gatherings. The interesting thing about these gatherings, is that at first, we were always “great”!! I mean, that was always the answer to life. “it’s great”

  • How’s your job? it’s great!
  • How’s your marriage/husband? it’s/he’s great!
  • How’s your house? it’s great!
  • Are you pregnant? Not yet, but we’re going to be soon!
  • How’s life?  it’s great!

Well, soon after that, some divorces occurred, and the “it’s great” line didn’t seem to fit. So, life got a little bit more real for us. Then, infertility set in, and “it’s great” didn’t fit at all. Then, second marriages, unexpected fertility and infertility set in, jobs changed, and step-children arrived on the scene. Life was weird, and “it’s great” didn’t seem to capture it anymore. So, now we’re REAL women.

We are women who have succeeded and women who have suffered. We are still sisters, but not just because we pledged a sorority together or lived in the dorms together, but because we have loved each other and supported each other through some grave circumstances. Because we have been there for each other in person, in prayer, in thought, in phone calls, and most importantly, in our hearts. We can honestly say now, “it’s NOT great, and here’s why…”. We can listen. We can learn from each other. And we can love each other still.

So, I guess I want to say thank you. Thank you to the women I have called “sisters” for many years. Sisters in my sorority, in my college, in my life, and in my heart. Thank you for letting me be fat, depressed, post partum, stressed out, and most of all, for letting me be a REAL woman with REAL issues. I love you, girls! I need you in my life! And, here’s to turning 40 in Mexico with you all by my side, (and a personal chef cooking our meals!!!!!)

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